Categories
2015 Racing Season

The New Unofficial F1 Weekend Format

It’s my understanding that the FIA is actively seeking recommendations for improving the F1 race weekend experience and after a few closed door meetings, the geniuses involved were unable to come up with any solutions that trump the current format.

Well, this is an opinion from the wrong side of the fence.

In the simplest terms possible, here is an easy solution for enhancing the fan experience, brought to you by a man who has invested way too much time and money into being an F1 aficionado.

For starters, here are my requirements for the on track entertainment that travels to all 18-22 venues with the big show.

  1. F1
  2. GP2
  3. Porsche Supercup
  4. Past F1 Driver Touring Car Shootout

These 4 classes would keep the masses entertained for three days.  I’m already loving the thought of Mika Hakkinen punting Nigel Mansell at Copse and sending the crowd into a frenzy.

3 DAY FORMAT:

Friday

  • 10:00 – 11:00: F1 Free Practice 1:  Nothing like traveling hundreds or thousands of miles and getting to the track on Friday AM all revved up for the first car on track.  It has to be an F1 car.  (And it has to be loud).
  • 12:00 – 2:30:  Support Series Practice
  • 3:00 – 4:00:  F1 FP2
  • 4:15 – 5:15:  REWARD THE BUZZARDS – Pit straight is opened to the fans for 1 hour to walk down and look into the garages.  Teams have to keep the doors open AND drivers have to hang around to greet their fans.  I know, poor guys have to slum it for a bit.  I can already see the promoters pulling their hair out over this proposal, but it needs to be done.  Sure there will be a few drunks or over zealous buzzards to police, but they can manage I’m sure.

 

Saturday

  • 8:00 – 10:30:  Support Series Qualifying
  • 11:00 – 12:00:  F1 FP3
  • 1:00 – 2:30:  F1 Qualifying
  • 3:00 – 3:30 – Past F1 Driver Touring Car Shootout Race 1
  • 4:00 – 5:30 GP2 Feature Race

 

Sunday

  • 9:00 – 10:00:  Porsche Supercup Race
  • 10:30 – 11:00:  Past F1 Driver Touring Car Shootout Race 2
  • 11:30 – 12:30: GP2 Sprint Race
  • 2:00 – 4:00:  F1 Race
  • 4:15: Track gates open to allow spectators to walk the track and run for the podium.

 

For traffic management purposes, give the fans the option of sticking around and watching Manu Chao do a 90 minute concert in the infield after every race. (is there anybody with more world appeal than Manu?)

This is so simple, yet so pleasing.

One other piece of business:  Simply watching and listening to F1 cars is no longer enough to satisfy our frenetic minds, so we need to be able to interact with F1 through our mobile devices as well.  My thoughts, take a page straight out of the NFL book and push fantasy racing leagues.  Fan Duels.  Draft Kings.  PROMOTE GAMBLING!

My game would look something like this:

Pick 10 head to head match-ups, determined after qualifying on Saturday (ex. Nico vs Lewis, Perez vs Hulkenberg), and then rank them 1-10 by the level you feel comfortable with.  If you are positive that Verstappen is going to beat Sainz, then make that your #1 head to head pick that is worth 50 points.

Example:

50 points – Head to Head Pick 1 (ex Verstappen def Sainz)

40 points – Head to Head Pick 2 (ex Vettel def Kimi)

35 points – Head to Head Pick 3 (Rossi def Stevens)

and down the line you go.

And to spice the game up, throw in a bunch of bonus questions:

5 points – First retirement

5 points – Most positions made up in the race

5 points – fastest pit stop

5 points – safety car yes/no

5 points – Race fastest lap

5 points – fastest speed trap mph

Should I keep going here?  You get the idea.  To keep people at home or in the stands engaged, the fantasy leader-board has to be constantly changing with “as they run” scenarios.  Have F1 promote the hell out of their fantasy game and get sponsors to reward prizes for race wins and season wins.  Allow fans to start private leagues and have a overall, season long champion.

Lastly, get up to speed with Social Media!  F1 needs a heavily promoted site where fans can share their content from a race weekend.  Selfies with Bottas, drunk buddy passed out in a McLaren hat, hot girl in Kimi bun shorts, sunrise pic in the campground, new friends in the stands from Columbia.  I just don’t see F1 keeping up with the mind of a millennial.  It’s time to loosen the reigns on their intellectual property.

Lastly 2.0 – They have to get back to loud motors and cars that look difficult to drive.  More decibels, more HP, wider rear wheels, more mechanical, less aero grip, and for the love of Jan Lammers, get rid of the silly DRS.

Categories
2015 Racing Season

MotoGP Madness

On a day when the first pitch of the Word Series will be tossed, the first tip of the NBA season is hours away and football is on 5 night per week, it’s easy for the motorsports world to get pushed to the back-burner, but for the few, the proud, who have been patiently waiting all season for fireworks, the maniacs of the MotoGP world have come through in spades.

What an amazing one-two punch in Australia and Malaysia!  The Phillip Island circuit, perched above the sea with a backdrop that rivals Pebble Beach, has always been one of the best on the GP calendar with a series of cringe worthy high speed corners that separate the men from the boys.  Even a processional race is enjoyable to watch on that track, but the 2015 edition Down Under was unequivocally, The Motorsports Race of the Year (or MROY)!

If you are reading this I trust that you have watched it, if not, go now immediately to a media outlet where you can watch every single second of that race.  

Australia had all of the ingredients for racing perfection:  A four man breakaway including the two title contending teammates, 3 makes of bike, each with major strengths and weaknesses that the riders could exploit lap after lap to their advantage, animal interference, 52 passes among the lead pack, and on the last lap of the race, Marc Marquez making up an impossible amount of time to catch and pass Jorge Lorenzo with two corners remaining with a forceful slide job up the inside.  Just a few yards behind the battle for the win, Andrea Iannone executed an equally remarkable pass on 9 time World Champion Valentino Rossi to cap off the ride of his lifetime.  It was equal parts thrilling and terrifying as these four brave men let it all hang out and remarkably came home in one piece.  And yes, I was so worked up I watched the last lap in a defensive stance while making animated air sucking noises and hushed battle cries, much to the chagrin of my poor wife.101815-motogp-phillip-island-results-f

If you followed the post race interviews and the lead up to Malaysia days after the race, the stage was set for a battle royal between Rossi and Marquez after Rossi accused Marquez of seeking revenge for a couple of clashes earlier in the season between the pair by purposely manipulating the Australian race to give Lorenzo the championship advantage.  In the moment it felt like Rossi was succumbing to the mounting championship pressure and was looking to blame others for his poor result rather than looking inward.  Could Marquez have been so cunning that he impeded Rossi in the closing laps and pulled off the miracle victory?  He did set the fastest lap of the race on the last lap on worn tires while also having to go off line to get Lorenzo in turn 10.  It was certainly something to ponder as the circus headed to the penultimate round of the championship.

Fast forward to mid race of the Malaysian GP and following a Hollywood style script that even Sly Stallone could have penned (sorry I’m still upset over Driven), we suddenly found Rossi stuck behind Marquez as Lorenzo was setting off in pursuit of Pedrosa for the win.  This was the critical moment in the race for Rossi to stay in touch with his teammate to protect his slim championship lead, but as fate would have it, he was going to have to go through a fired up Marquez looking for a fight.

And what a fight it turned out to be.  Those in the Rossi camp suddenly saw justification for their argument as Marquez almost played with Rossi as they spectacularly passed and re-passed each other around the 3.445 mile, 15 turn Sepang Circuit. On lap 5 alone they set a MotoGP record for making 9 passes. (yes 9).   It was ballsy stuff that again had me sucking air like a fish out of water.  Rossi was imploring Marquez like a peloton leader in the pedal bike race to fall in line and work together so they could catch the vanishing leaders, but Marquez seemed content to put on a display of machismo.  You could feel the disgust in Rossi by his body language and it seemed inevitable that the big one was coming for one or both men, when suddenly, Rossi sat up mid corner with Marquez pinned to his outside, slowly rolled the bike to the edge of the track, looked at Marquez eye to eye and……..Karate Kicked Him!  

https://youtu.be/-o_rRRGhhbE

 

Down went Marquez like a sack of potatoes as Rossi accelerated off into the distance.  Was it a Euro soccer flop or did Rossi really pack enough punch to drop the champ? The crowd was roaring over the sound of the bikes.  This was James Bond movie stuff.  This was Schumacher blatantly driving into the side of Villeneuve in Jerez, Prost and Senna taking each other off in Suzuka.  The tv view of Marquez’s father going bonkers in the garage was priceless.  It seemed a certainty that Rossi was going to be black flagged but the officials let him continue on to take a controversial 3rd place.

As the dust has finally settled, Rossi will now have to start at the back of the grid for the finale next weekend at Valencia with a 7 point cushion over Lorenzo.  It will no doubt be thrilling to watch Rossi carve his way into contention and will likely go down to the last lap.  If Lorenzo wins, Rossi has to be 2nd to clinch.  If Lorenzo is 2nd, Rossi has to be 3rd.  If the Honda’s dominate and Lorenzo finishes 3rd, Rossi just has to be 6th or better.  Thank you MotoGP!

 

F1 Thoughts:

I confess, I’m bored with F1 at the moment, but the last two races in Sochi and Austin have had their moments.  It was wonderful to see the Red Bulls jump all over the Mercedes boys in Austin early in the race in the drying conditions and briefly lead.  In Russia, the safety car tire strategy that Perez and Ricciardo employed set the table nicely for a 4 man battle for 3rd that ended on the final lap when Kimi pretended to be a buzzed teen at a local K1 karting center and punted Bottas, handing Perez a much deserved podium.  Perez has been driving beautifully of late and has turned the tables back on Hulkenberg, who seemed to carry a Le Mans victory high into the early summer races.  Mexico will be jumping this weekend!

Turn 3 at Sochi is so cool.  It’s just a long, flat, wide open, 180 degree corner where the cars seem to be loaded up and on the limit for 5 or 6 seconds. SochiThere is really nothing else like it on the calendar.  It’s like they tossed in turns 1-2 from the Milwaukee Mile.

On the subject of wide open 180 degree corners, Austin’s Turn 16-18 is a nice complex, but the three I long for are Istanbul Turn 8, The Bosch Kurve at the old Osterreichring and the Peraltada in Mexico City.  I think my dad and I still discuss monthly the day we sat at the exit of the Peraltada for the ‘87 Mexican GP and Senna and DeCesaris got hooked up.  For about 10 consecutive laps, the psychotic Italian in his Brabham stalked Senna in the Lotus through the Peraltada at 175mph never more than 2 inches apart.  It was like they were attached by a small 2 inch wire.  People around us, myself included, were starting to get a little uneasy when we knew they were due on the scene and would visibly flinch as the 2 car train blasted into view just 25 yards away from us.  When suddenly the PA announcer was going nuts over an accident on the other side of the circuit, we all let out a sigh of relief.

At one point during the rain delay in Austin, Will Buxton was talking to Max Verstappen and the subject of Red Bull pulling both teams and three car teams came up.  I immediately got all geeked up and started placing my drivers for next year.  So, knowing who is already signed and who would be unemployed if both Red Bull and Toro Rosso pulled out, here is my fantasy driver lineup:

Mercedes: Lewis, Nico, Verstappen

Ferrari: Vettel, Kimi, Ricciardo

Williams: Bottas, Massa, Sainz

Force India:  Perez, Hulkenberg, Kvyat

Lotus: Maldonado, Palmer, Magnussen

McLaren: Button, Alonso, Van Doorne

Sauber: Nasr, Ericsson, Kobayashi

Manor: Rossi, Buemi, Vergne

Haas: Grosjean, Guiterrez, Conor Daly?  (the 3rd Haas seat has to be an American)

Final Note: Congrats to Lewis Hamilton for Title #3!  He definitely belongs in that rarefied air of the all time greats.  I remember loving the Autosport story about the little 10 year old bugger who went up to Ron Dennis at the Autosport Awards banquet and told him he would be his driver one day. lewis-hamilton-kar_1054030cFrom that moment I’ve been a fan and while he can at times seem like a cocky bastard, he’s an ace behind the wheel and will probably win another 2-3 before he’s done.  Nico is officially his whipping boy and I don’t see why Merc won’t win it again next year.

Come on 2017 Rule Changes!!!!   

Categories
2015 Racing Season

Dale Earnhardt at Sears Point

I was making the rounds on FB yesterday and a friend who was a long time race driving instructor had this fantastic photo of a new student posted:

 

Helmet Pic

 

Yes this is actually real!  Of course, this drew the interest of his racing instructor friends who made comments such as:

Most dumb moves at racing school are made by men. Women listen and follow directions … Except this one.

And:  There are gender-specific dumb moves. Waiting til the “1” marker to brake in t11 on an out-lap? That’s a dude. Stopping on the front straight to ask a question? That’s a lady.

But what really got me fired up and made me want to share this chain was this nugget about the day that Dale Earnhardt was a student at Sears Point:

Funny and sorta related racing school story. Back in 1989 when NASCAR first added the Point to their schedule, there was a sudden (and understandable) spike in the number of pro racers who signed up for the Bondurant school there. Ron Nelson had the pleasure of having Dale Earnhardt as his student. Typical class included the instructor at the wheel giving the student the pointers on where to begin braking, what gear, the line, etc. before the “student” took the wheel for a slow lap before doing a hot one. Naturally Dale hit the track at speed and hot into it. Coming out of 9 he says (somewhat casually in his distinctive Southern drawl) “I forget, is 10 flat?” to which Ron replies (somewhat alarmed) “NO! 10 is NOT flat!!!” And Dale replies “Nah. I think its flat.” and proceeds to enter 10 flat out and into a drift, sliding off the track, over the curb, across the dirt and just barely kissing the tire wall, all with his right foot still on the floorboard. Nelson nearly had a heart attack, and as Dale got it back onto the pavement he says (still very calmly) “Well Hell. Its ALMOST flat!”.

dale-earnhardt-4

 

 

 

Categories
2015 Racing Season

Indycar Recap

I’ll admit it, I’ve been suffering from a severe case of summer writer’s block.  I’ve got a backlog of post ideas floating around my head, ranging from a look back at the gorgeous Ferrari 643 to unveiling the Top 5 Studio Drummers of the 70’s, but I just haven’t been able to wrest the cold beer from my hands and turn the TV off long enough to get the creative juices flowing.  The primary reason is the lack of intrigue in the sporting and racing landscape of late, but I’m also placing the blame on the fact that my wife went to work for a ride sharing mobile app technology company, leaving me with morning and evening Mr Mom duties in addition to my day job. (Note: One of the perks of Mr. Mom duties is unlimited access of the Elmo song catalog.  Seriously, “Elmo’s Got the Moves” is getting more airplay in my head than The Beatles, Stones and Kinks combined.)  But witnessing the thrills, spills and heartbreak over the past fortnight in Indycar, I think it’s time for a few Indycar Random Thoughts.

Tragedy

Being a racing fan can be difficult at times.  Sadly, the emotions of losing a beloved racing driver are feelings that I’ve become accustomed to since I was a child.  I will never forget the moment in our family room when I found out that my first driving hero, Gilles Villeneuve, had perished in qualifying for the ‘82 Belgian GP in Zolder.  I had witnessed Gilles at the ‘81 & ‘82 Long Beach GP’s and had been mesmerized by his flair behind the wheel.  It was love at first sight and I quickly set about transforming my room into a mini shrine filled with posters on the walls, magazines and books in every corner, die-cast models, t-shirts, and I was eagerly counting down the days to the ‘83 LBGP.  And then I came home on a Saturday afternoon and was told by my emotional father that Gilles was gone.  “Gone?  He can’t really be gone?” I thought.  I had no experience in dealing with death of any kind other than burying a goldfish or two.  It was a surreal experience and I can remember crying a few times over my loss, but I was a resilient 11 year old and was quickly looking forward to hearing about the next race.

To this day, I still can’t stop thinking about the death of Ayrton Senna.  I’m at peace now with his passing but I could hardly function for a week after his death and from time to time I still have a good cry thinking about the man.  It’s like a part of my youth died with him and I had to grow up and become a calloused adult.  The F1 fantasy bubble that I had existed in with Ayrton, Nigel and Prost from the ages of 13-23 had burst and the sudden change was a shock to the system.  From that day on, I had to construct an emotional barrier to these drivers because I wasn’t equipped to experience sadness like I felt for Ayrton again.  The experience hardened me and made me come to view drivers as extraordinarily brave men following a passion and if they happened to perish in the car, then they went out doing what they loved and I was at peace with that.  To my young adult mind, it was a life well lived.  

A few months after Senna’s death, I used to have the following philosophical debate with fellow buzzards after a few too many cold ones:  If you could have Ayrton’s 34 great years on the planet, would you trade your life for it now, not knowing what your future is going to look like?  Of course the 23 year old me would always answer a resounding Yes!  

Even as a hardened racing fan,  I’ll never shake the images of watching Dale Earnhardt, Jeff Krosnoff, Greg Moore, Dan Wheldon, Marco Simoncelli and Justin Wilson perish on live TV.  It’s just hard to believe that a larger than life hero, someone who you feel like you know personally, can be entertaining us one second and in an instant, be lost forever.  

I was hiking solo a few days ago and was questioning how the other drivers continue on after losing one of their competitors and friends?  The scenario in my head was:  What would I do if I was riding with my mountain bike gang on Sunday and one of the guys had a large tree branch fall on his head and kill him instantly.  Would I want to go back out the next Friday with the gang and do it again?  These drivers with “The Right Stuff” certainly are a different breed.

So farewell to Justin “Badass” Wilson!  I’ve been a fan for many years, dating back to his days as the 2001 F3000 champion, and I’ve had the good fortune of witnessing him score his only World Championship Points for Jaguar in the 2003 Indy GP and podiums in Cart and Indycar at Long Beach and San Jose.  Being 6’5” myself, I immediately took a liking to a 6’4” driver who could contort his lanky frame into a chassis and still have the feel and touch in the ass, hands and feet to get it done at the highest level.  JWill joins a long list of drivers who never got a fair shake in F1, but I’ll always be confused why a few of these knucklehead Cart/Indy team owners didn’t snatch him up immediately when he crossed the pond in 2004.  Even in cars that should have been mid-pack at best, Wilson’s prodigious skills still shone through and for those of us hard-cores who truly get it, Wilson will be remembered as one of the greats of his era, right there with the Dario’s, Dixon’s and Kanaan’s of the world.  It breaks my heart that a quality man won’t get to grow old with his wife and two young daughters, but he died following his passion and we have to respect the choice that he made when he stepped into the car.  A life well lived indeed!

 

Randoms

-Moments before the Pocono race took a serious turn for the worse, I was loving PT in the booth referring to Sage Karam as “Dangerboy.”  Very appropriate for this youngster.  Cheers to NBCSN for the team that they assembled to broadcast the races.  Now if the series could just rid themselves of the ABC contract.

-I still can only watch an Indy race on the DVR.  For green flag racing, Indycar is tops in my book but the prolonged yellow is a lifesucker.  The instant I see that yellow bugger being waved I’m on the gas pedal until they are back to green.  On the road circuits, do they really need the local street sweeping crew to come out and perform a 15 minute demonstration on how to clean a racing line?  The reality is one green flag lap with Sato and Colletti in the field will bring back all the dirt and then some.  These guys are pros and can still put on a show with a little dirt to contend with.  I know that it’s difficult to concede that the brains running F1 are incredibly innovative, but Indycar needs to invest a little money into the virtual safety car idea so the races can continue to be races and not 4 heats with 3 long yellow parades.  Call me old fashioned but I think the fastest cars should win the race most of the time.  Right now it’s completely a roll of the dice.  

-Watching the three 500 mile races this year, I’m sort of amazed that there was only one fatality.  I know that sounds horrible, but these guys were racing each other inches apart for 1500 miles like the world was coming to an end.  Great viewing for us fans, but man that must be nerve wracking to compete in.  I still can’t stop thinking about the fact that during one of the restarts at Pocono, they were running 7 wide {7 WIDE} at over 200mph for turn 1.  Besides watching Isle of Man TT videos on YouTube, 7 WIDE is the craziest thing we’ll witness this or any motorsports season.  Seriously, if Hamilton, Rosberg and Vettel were to just go 3 wide at Monza this weekend, books would be written about it 30 years from now celebrating the great 3 wide battle at Monza.  Come on with 7 wide already!  

-Scott Dixon is the perfect driver for Indycar’s Roll The Dice Racing.  He’s as safe as they come, can put the hammer down or coast with the best of them, and doesn’t get too rattled when he suddenly finds himself in P15 after dominating the first 20 laps due to getting caught out in a yellow.  4 titles and counting for the likable Kiwi.  I’ll be surprised if he’s not a 6 timer before hanging up the helmet.

-Mike Hull and the Target Box Crew are also the best in the business.  It’s sort of amazing how they continually pull one over on the Penske brain-trust.  The championship winning pit stop where Dixon jumped Power and Newgarden was a thing of beauty and their ability to get Kimball and TK into the top 4 to give Dixon the cover he needed was phenomenal teamwork.    Since Penske, Ganassi and Andretti all defected from CART to Indycar, Ganassi has produced 7 driving champions, Andretti 4 and Penske 2.

-Revelation of the Year:  Newgarden is a quick as anybody in the field and should be hired by a top team immediately.  Or, Gene Haas should snap him up for the new USF1 team and get him alongside Vergne or Buemi.

-Surprise of the Year:  Rahal and his team totally elevated their game and carried the fight for Honda against the Chevy armada.  Graham was a man possessed with some drives for the ages and seeing him whip the local Ohioans into a frenzy usually only witnessed for Euro megastars at Mid-O was exactly the sort of the development that Indycar needs to get back into the spotlight.  Maybe the fact that Graham’s fiance, Courtney Force, drives a 8,000 horsepower funny car for her day job spurred Graham on to greatness?  It must be amusing to listen to their Sunday evening debriefs.

-Disappointment of the Year:  Simon Pagenaud’s first year at Penske was shit.  I honestly thought the Frenchman was immediately going to be the Dixon-esque driver that Penske has been seeking and was going to be the perfect blend of speed, engineering smarts and poise.  I don’t know what just happened but here’s to hoping he gets a new engineer and crew manager for 2016.

-Worst Driver of the Year:  Stefano Coletti.  Indycars are heavy and difficult to drive and the Monaco native simply could not adapt.  He’s very fortunate to be going home with his brain and body still intact.

-Final thought:  It was great to see JPM get his game back and lead the title fight from St Pete’s until the final lap of the final race, but I feel like Juan went into point protect mode way too early this year and it ultimately cost him the title.  The man is a fighter and it was painful to watch him cruise around for points.  It was like the football prevent defense that always backfires. Penske needs to just let the Columbian charge and the points will take care of themselves.  

Here’s to hoping for a continuation of this mega battle next season and added races at Road America, Phoenix and Mexico City.

I am Indy!

 

justin-wilson-jaguar_3341618

 

 

 

Wilson

Categories
2015 Racing Season

Indy 500 Time

As Memorial Day nears, it’s time for Indycar to step out of the shadows and into the spotlight for a few hours on Sunday for the 99th running of the Indy 500.  For the floundering series, this is their one and only chance to showcase their abundantly talented drivers on the world’s most exciting racetrack.  One could argue that circuits such as Spa, Suzuka and Road America are the ultimate tests of man pushing a car to the limit, but for breathtaking drama, Indy is impossible to beat.  It is after all, “The Greatest Spectacle in Racing!”  Those 4 corners were designed to perfection and for almost a Century, drivers careers have been defined by their success or failure at the legendary Brickyard.  The precision required to master the oval is measured in millimeters and one slip up can lead to heartbreak, or in some cases, death.  In a world of extreme sports where people are tempting fate on a daily basis and car racing is no longer viewed as the pinnacle of perilous pursuits, racing 33 Indycars at Indy for 500 miles is still flat out spectacular and filled with danger.

I’ll be honest, I can’t decide if I love Indycar or if I hate it?  I know It’s a complete mess from top to bottom, but I still can’t turn away.  It’s my favorite dysfunctional reality show.  Daily, I devour any and all Indycar information that I can get my eyes on and then turn to the online chat rooms to chuckle at the trolls waging war with each other.

In a world where any form of entertainment imaginable is available at your fingertips (note: I just discovered the Legends Football League where women play 7 on 7 tackle football in bikinis),  Indycar has been reduced to a flickering distant light in the great cable TV wasteland.  Even amongst legitimate car racing fans, Indycar has maneuvered it’s way into racing’s No Man’s Land because of a multitude of factors:

  • There is not an American household name to generate headlines in the mainstream press
  • The open wheel spec formula doesn’t resonate with the automotive enthusiast
  • The technology isn’t sophisticated enough for the engineering buff
  • The series is not glamorous enough for the coastal elite
  • Yet, It’s too foreign-centric for the middle of the country
  • There are not enough ovals for the traditional American racing fan
  • There are not enough classic circuits for the road racing purist

I could ramble on and on trying to diagnose the root issues, but in my humble opinion, Indycar is still fantastic motorsports entertainment. Check this 24 hour towing in NYC, great service !!

Here is how I would rate the first 5 races of the season to date.  As you will see, it really is a classic representation of the roller coaster racing series that is Indycar.

Total Farce: The New Orleans Swamp Prix.  What a joke!  The only thing missing from this farce was Stefano Colletti striking an alligator in the giant pool of standing water just off the main straight during his wild spin on one of the endless restart attempts.  Besides the 2005 Indy F1 race where only 6 cars took the grid after the Michelin shod cars pulled out for safety reasons, this is the worst I’ve ever seen.  Like that Indy fiasco, any fan who attended the Swamp Prix should be given free tickets for next years race (if the promoter is crazy enough to try that again).

TyrrellXWingsPretty Bad:  The St Pete’s Flying Debris Grand Prix.  For the season opener, the new Chevy and Honda aero kits had a variety of bizarre winglets in odd places that called to mind some of the F1 cars from 1997, where designers such as Harvey Postlethwaite found a loophole in the rule-book and produced some abhorrent looking cars.   And no surprise, when you pit 22 hungry drivers together on a tight, bumpy street circuit with no real experience of racing with vertical appendages on all four corners of the car, the shit hit the fan.  It felt like half the day was spent under debris cautions and one terribly unlucky lady was hit in the head by a flying piece as she was walking on the other side of the grandstand far removed from the track.  The saving grace was watching JPM handle a punt attempt from Power to take the win and then have a laugh about it afterwards.  I like this old man JPM.

Pretty Average:  The “Other” Indy GP.  Helio Castroneves messed up the race for about ¼ of the field after he misjudged the first corner and nailed Scott Dixon, causing chaos all the way to the last row.  In true Indycar race control fashion, Helio escaped a penalty on the track but finally was docked points for his error on the Wednesday after the race.  Go figure? Once the dust settled though, Graham Rahal put on a fantastic charge and almost caught Will Power.

Well Done:  The Long Beach Grand Prix (for drunk people with tats).  I had the pleasure of being down in turn 1 for The Beach this year and after an early debris caution that took way too long to clear and caused some pit-lane chaos, eliminating Will Power’s chances, the race settled into a nice rhythm where every driver, save Francesco Dracone, was pushing to the limit and putting up a solid fight with the cars around them.  Out-laps under green on cold tires are always a thing of beauty when the car in pursuit can make up a second in 4 corners.  And I loved watching Conor Daly getting down to business after only getting the call to drive for Dale Coyne on Saturday am in the middle of his breakfast.  When it was all said and done, Daly had the fastest lap in the race among Honda drivers.  Get the kid a ride already!

Fantastic!:  The Barber ‘Bama Roll Tide GP.  What a race!  What a track!  Wheel to wheel combat all day long, Matchett, Bell and Diffey calling the action, a ballsy pass by Newgarden on Helio to win the race and a brilliant charge by Rahal for second.  It just makes you think, if only they scheduled more flowing, smooth tracks with a couple of excellent braking zones, the sky could be the limit.  These goofy looking cars are great vehicles for this stellar field of drivers to strut their stuff.  Oh and DUMP ABC ASAP!.  My God they suck the life out of the race.

And so who will be slugging milk and kissing bricks on Sunday?  I’ll be shocked if the winning car comes from any team other than Penske or Ganassi. For the sake of Indycar’s future, I hope Sage Karam drafts by Simon Pagenaud out of Turn 4 on the last lap and wins the race by a nose.  And for good measure, I hope Pagenaud then tackles Karam in Victory Circle and Karam knocks the Frenchman out with a milk jug shot to the head.
Here’s to a safe and exciting day!

 

JPM

 

Categories
2015 Racing Season

The 2015 F1 Fly Away Report

The 2015 season opening fly-away races are in the books and the teams now head back to their bases for arguably the most important three weeks of the year.  The development race for Barcelona is on and will likely decide how the remainder of the year will play out.  It’s Mercedes vs Ferrari. Renault and Honda working to save face.  Williams trying to keep the mid pack at bay.  I can’t wait to see who has found a couple of tenths to reshuffle the order yet again.

For the drivers it’s time to pack their Speedo swimsuits away for the more temperate climates of Continental Europe and pray that their teams have found the magic solution that will propel them to glory and riches.

Here are some general ramblings:

To Sebastian Vettel (& Ferrari):  I apologize (kind of).  I have publicly flip flopped on Vettel’s driving talents so many times over the past year that I’ve killed any chance of ever running for public office.  I can already see the debate playing out:

Bul Bulifant:  “So in conclusion, my aim is to help Americans collecting false disability get back into the $10/hr working pool to restore some dignity to their lives!”

Opponent:  “That all sounds great but what about a little blog you had years ago where you anointed Sebastian Vettel the equal of Senna, then after one bad season lumped him in with Pastor Maldonado, only to get back on his bandwagon when he restored honor to The Scuderia?  My good people, is this the sort of man you want running your Country?”

Back to Vettel- I had him in my pre season #7 spot and admittedly, the 4 time champ has made a fool out of me.  Ferrari in general have totally surpassed my expectations, much to my delight.  Having the red cars in the game is always great for the sport, particularly when they are the challenger.  There is something that just brings out the passion in all F1 devotees when an underdog Ferrari wins.  It’s as good as it gets.  I’m not about to place Vettel back in the rarefied air of Alonso-Hamilton, but he’s back in ‘the discussion”.

Here is “the discussion” that I have in my head from time to time:

Q: If you were a F1 team manager and could not hire Lewis or Fernando, who would your next three calls be to?

A: Knowing what I know this very second, I would call in order:  Ricciardo, Vettel, Bottas. (sorry Nico).

It appears that after a horrible start, Kimi may have found his rhythm under the desert lights in Bahrain so it will be fascinating to see who gets the upper hand in the team moving forward.  Seb looks to have more outright pace, but Kimi is a metronome over a race distance and may provoke Seb into more errors like we witnessed last weekend.

Credit also to Ferrari’s new technical director, James Allison, who clearly is a guru when it comes to art of designing a car that is kind to it’s tires, andArrivabene their new Team Boss, Maurizio Arrivabene, who brings some much needed machismo back to keep the ranks fueled with passion.

McLaren:  It was obvious McLaren were in trouble heading to Melbourne, but did you honestly think that they would be 3-4 seconds a lap off the pace?  When they took to the track on the first Friday of the year, I thought I was witnessing the ‘97 Mastercard Lola in the hands of Riccardo Rosett instead of the long awaited reunification of McLaren and Honda.  But credit to McLaren and Honda, they are chopping away at the seemingly insurmountable deficit and suddenly look like they will be a welcome addition to the Force India, Toro Roso, Sauber, Lotus wars by Barcelona.

(editors note:  Good luck dealing with Maldonado guys.  He’s the new Andrea De Cesaris)

Here is a quick look at Q1 over the first 4:

Australia:  Hamilton 1:28.586  Button: 1:31.422   Deficit (2.836 secs)

Malaysia:  Hamilton 1:39.296  Button: 1:41.636   Deficit (2.34 secs)

China:  Hamilton 1:38.285  Alonso: 1:39.276  Deficit (.991 secs)

Bahrain:  Hamilton 1:33.928  Alonso: 1.35.2  Deficit (1.272 secs)

As you can see, the gap is coming down significantly and equally impressive, Fernando seems very calm and composed over the situation.  Maybe he’s simply mellowing with age or maybe he knows that Honda are going about their business in the polite Japanese manor of not clobbering the competition right out of the gate and will unleash their true potential in the coming months.  Personally I think this could be the story of the year.  If they can get to the Williams and Red Bulls by year end that will be a phenomenal comeback, equivalent to coming back from 28 down in an NFL game.

On the inter team battle, Button and Alonso look to be evenly matched.  Granted the sample size of 2 races (Fernando missed race 1, Jenson DNS race 4) is too small to draw any real conclusions, but for Button to hang with Alonso for two races is impressive.  Alonso is the undisputed teammate killer.  From his days starting at Benetton he’s crushed:  Trulli, Villeneuve, Fisichella, Piquet, Grosjean, Massa and Kimi.  Only Lewis was able to match the pace of Alonso and if Button can keep it close, that will be a massive achievement and justification that the team was wise to keep the old Brit around for a few years before sending him off to the WEC pastures.

Renault and Red Bull:  What a terrible start to the year!  It’s obvious that Renault have done a very poor job of developing this 2015 engine and are clearly behind Merc and Ferrari, but for all of the Red Bull goons, from Christian Horner all the way up to Dietrich Mateschitz, to publicly bash their partner and threaten to quit the sport entirely if they can’t have their way is despicable.  Did they not just win 4 straight Constructors titles while powered by Renault?  Hasn’t history proved that different makes and manufactures rise and fall from glory?  Afterall, Renault have “only” powered 12 constructors champions over the last 25 years.

It’s a bummer to see Ricciardo stuck battling for 7th place at the moment while the talented Kvyatt is experiencing a horrific beginning to his season, but I expect Renault to make some improvements and the Red Bulls to be mixing it up with the William’s boys soon.

(ed note:  If Baby Dietrich does pick up his toys and “fly’s” away because Renault can’t win every year, I will never order a $27 Red Bull & Vodka in a Las Vegas strip club again.  Do you hear me now Dietrich?  On the bright side, maybe Gene Haas will be able to poach a bunch of RB guys for the soon to be Next American F1 Fiasco.)

Hamilton is #1:  Unfortunately for us, the folks on the couch staring bleary eyed at the screen while scratching, biting and picking, Nico has regressed from last year and Lewis is now the clear cut Number 1 driver for Mercedes.  It seems that last year when Lewis dropped out of the opener and Nico won, Lewis was unsettled and started pressing early due to his deficit in the points and the fact that Nico was remarkably quick in qualifying. This year, it’s the other way around.  Lewis is the relaxed champ doing his thing and Nico is slumping while he tries to come to grips with the pace of Lewis.  Nico desperately needs a win to get his confidence back but with Lewis 4-0 in qualifying and 3-0 in race wins, and the double points race at the end of the year off the table, I’m officially crowning Lewis Hamilton the 2015 F1 World Driving Champion.  Well done lad.  Now just quit spraying down the podium girls with the bubbly.  This isn’t a wet t-shirt contest.

(editors note:  I just had a great flashback to the wet t-shirt contest in the movie “Hot Dog”.  If you have never seen it, do so at once.)

Toro Toro:  The Toro Rosso kids have been mighty impressive.  Poor reliability with the Renault powerplant has let them down but I’m calling both lotusVerstappen and Sainz future F1 winners, and the coolest young paring since Hakkinen/Herbert in the ‘92 Castrol Lotus.  The way they came out attacking in Australia had me believing I was witnessing the next Senna and Prost.  In his first ever Q1 session, 17 year old Max Verstappen was P4!  And not to be outdone, Sainz Jr finished Q3 in P8!  In Malaysia they finished the race P7 and P8 in their Renault powered chassis while the Renault powered Red Bulls finished P9 and P10.  Now before I get too crazy and go online to order a Verstappen helmet hat, I should call out that in Bahrain they did seem to be going backwards.  But my question is, was that a result of the engine just not getting it done or are these two beginners not able to provide the feedback necessary to develop a car?  I’m hoping for a rain race to see what sort tricks they have in store.

 

Buzzardly Yappings:  Both Sauber and Lotus look to be back with sensible cars after last year’s disasters and Nasr is another rookie who knows how to peddle a race car.  Grosjean is now the steady seasoned pro and Pastor is certifiable Loco en la Cabeza  …….It’s nice to see Williams still competitive after their years out in the wilderness, but I’m fearing that last year was their high point and they will slowly regress back to the midpack when RB and McLaren get their acts together……This new formula works for TV but the thought of a quiet F1 car still doesn’t sit well with me and certainly doesn’t make me want to rush out and buy tickets to travel to Austin for a snoozer.  Although Austin has enough other things going on to make it a great trip no matter how wimpy the F1 cars are now……There goes Bernie again threatening to drop Monza and add Baku.  With Bernie’s current sanctioning fees, I have a hard time understanding why anybody would even consider hosting a F1 race unless, of course, the man behind the race is a small endowed megalomanic trying to capture the love of a Hollywood starlet….On the subject of financial irresponsibility, why would 20130426-forma1-james-huntsomebody invest in keeping the former Maurissa (now Manor) team going?  My only thought is that Stephen Fitzpatrick must be trying to emulate the legendary Lord Hesketh and have an excuse to throw parties at races…….What happened to blue chip sponsors?  I know the sport took a massive hit when tobacco advertising was banned worldwide, but one would think with the US markets trading near all time highs and companies flushed with cash, some of these teams would be able to tap into the tech sponsorship pool.  Get some slick salespeople with Brit accents to start setting up some meetings at The Rosewood on Sandhill Rd and sell these young techies on the F1 “cool” factor……Where is Schumi??  In this day and age of constant media scrutiny, how has the condition of F1’s all time winner been kept under wraps for so long?  I’m fearful that the lack of news means he’s not doing well but that man is a warrior so I’ll hope for the best.  So sad and a reminder that life can change instantly so I better quit trying to be an amatuer F1 journalist here and get out side and enjoy the day.


Let’s hope for a great show in Spain and I’ll get back to you for more buzzardly talk before Monaco.

Categories
2015 Racing Season

F1 2015

With the rise of the self driving Google electric car just a decade or so away, I’m viewing the coming years as the swan song for motorsports as we know it.  Sure there will still be underground petrol heads engaging in club racing activities in places such as Siberia, but in general, the world will soon cease caring about man’s pursuit of driving excellence.  Therefore, I’m aiming to cherish F1 2015 as if it may be the final season.  And why not, the computers have won, so let’s just enjoy it while we still can.

If you were turned off by the dominance of the Mercedes W05 in 2014, I’d advise you to take up a new hobby to fill your Sunday’s in 2015.  Mercedes are back with a dominant car and should continue on with their winning ways.  But if you prefer to buzzard by the glass half full belief that it only takes two cars to make a great race, here are a bunch of random thoughts as to why this year will be mega.

Nico Rosberg has learned from his mistakes.  Last year Nico surprised the paddock with his pace and had Lewis reeling for much of the year.  In qualifying Nico beat Lewis 11-7, but Lewis still seemed to have the edge at stringing together quick laps on fading tires and pressured Nico into two critical errors while leading.  But Nico is a cerebral man who will have spent his winter addressing his weaknesses and will come back fitter and more mentally prepared to deal with his freakishly talented teammate.

I see this Mercedes situation as the McLaren-Honda team of ‘88-’89 all over again.  In ‘88, Senna (the freak of all freaks) came in and overwhelmed Alain Prost with his sheer speed and audacious on track etiquette.  The Professor took his lumps, went into his lab and came back to beat the mighty 1988-McLaren-Honda-MP4-4Brazilian the following year in part because of his mastery of psychological warfare.  I expect Nico to do the same.  This mano-a-mano battle should be fascinating.

Ferrari, Vettel and Raikkonen, the three biggest letdowns of 2014, are now one big happy family.  After last years embarrassing campaign, Ferrari have cleaned house and brought in an ensemble of highly paid personnel to restore glory to the Scuderia.  Most notably, their new lead driver Sebastian Vettel.  The fact that the 4 time World Champion had his helmet handed to him by Ricciardo last year was downright shocking.  I’ll admit it, after foolishly proclaiming Vettel the equal of Senna, I’m now officially in the buzzard camp who believes that 100% of Vettel’s success was due solely to the ingenious diffuser that Adrian Newey had bolted on the back of that Red Bull.  This will be Seb’s chance to restore his reputation and emulate his German idol, Michael Schumacher.  Sebs new best mate, Kimi, is coming iceman2_1280off having his helmet, steering wheel, ass and balls handed to him by Alonso but should benefit greatly by having a 2015 car more tailored to his driving preferences.  When Ferrari started designing this 2015 machine, Kimi was their lone contracted driver so I’m expecting the Iceman to deliver the goods once again.

Kvyat!  There is a high likelihood that Russia will be able to lay claim to a GP winner by years end. (note: Will there ever be an American F1 champ again?).  It will be fascinating to see how Daniil Kvyat fares in the spotlight.  One thing’s for certain, he will be feeling the heat quickly if he’s not a match for the sensational Daniel Ricciardo and young Max Verstappen is lighting it up in the junior team.

McLaren.  Remember last year when the Red Bull could barely complete three consecutive laps in testing with a myriad of teething issues and then showed up and placed 3rd in the opening round? (note: Ricciardo was later DQ’d for some minor infraction).  I have a feeling that while it may take time for the Honda package to come together, the car is fundamentally quick.  Button and Magnussen both have been quoted as saying that all of last year’s issues have been sorted and they have laid down some quick lap times in their limited amount of track time.  And of course if the car is a dog, it will be great to watch Alonso vs Ron Part II.

Bottas.  2015 is the year that Bottas cements his status as a future champ.  Keke, Mika, Kimi and soon……BOTTAS!  Let’s get the clear booze out now and start celebrating.  I wish he could accomplish this feat driving a Williams but I think he’s going to have to slip into a seat at McLaren in a year or two to get the job done.

Toro Rosso!  The Helmut Marko/Franz Tost driver finishing school has their two most exciting students to date.  If there were ever children bred to be drivers, Verstappen and Sainz Jr are it.  Young Max is the product of the legendary Dutch Devil and his Belgian karting mom, Sophie Kumpen. Carlos-SainzCarlos Sainz Jr is the product of…well…Carlos Sainz, the legendary Spanish rally driver who I believe is the inspiration for the Dos Equis “World’s Most Interesting Man” commercials.  I can’t wait to see how they fare in the big time.

Mexico is back!  It’s so cool to see the Autodromo Hermanos Rodriguez back on the calendar.  Sure the track had to be Tilkefied to some degree, but judging by the track map it’s still a unique circuit that should produce a great race.  Kudos to Bernie for bringing Austria back last year and Mexico this year.  That place Mexicowill be packed with Perez mania in full swing.

Drivers have to keep their helmet colors!  I know that I sound a little neurotic for calling this out but these drivers who change their colors every other race drive me nuts.  I want to look at a car for a split second and say Arnoux, Fabi, Boutsen, Alboreto, Alliot, De Cesaris, Warwick, Tambay, Cheever, Laffitte, etc.  Their helmet is their identity and they should be proud of their colors.

 

Having said that, here are the picks to take to the bank:

 

  1. Hamilton – 9 wins
  2. Rosberg – 7 wins
  3. Ricciardo – 3 wins
  4. Kvyat – 1 win
  5. Raikkonen
  6. Bottas
  7. Vettel
  8. Alonso
  9. Massa
  10. Button
  11. Hulkenberg
  12. Grosjean
  13. Perez
  14. Verstappen
  15. Maldonado
  16. Nasr
  17. Sainz
  18. Ericsson
  19. Merhi
  20. Stevens