Categories
2014 Racing Season

Racing Round Table

If you are a fan of motorsports in the USA, particularly the various forms of road racing, you know that it can at times be a nomadic experience.  Do the math.  The Indy race on Sunday in Toronto drew an average of 484,000 viewers during the telecast on NBCSN.  Sounds great until you factor in that there are over 317,000,000 people living in this great land.  So, with only roughly .153% or 1 out of every 655 people watching, it’s easy to understand why there isn’t a lot of Monday morning office motorsport talk around the water cooler.

But don’t let those depressing stats get you down.  Simply invent some imaginary friends to have a chat with.

For this first installment of the Bulseyeview motorsports round table, I’ll be moderating and firing questions at my “friends” Alfred Haybale Murphy and Tab St Claire.  To give you a quick background, Haybale is a big old lug with a Duck Dynasty beard and a love of anything with a motor.  Tab is an urban metro-sexual who takes his motorsport flashy.  Haybale is a working class family man who loves to get his hands dirty and karts on the weekend while Tab rides ten speeds, dates beautiful women who always look annoyed and attends races with a button-down shirt tucked in and cologne on.  But they are both passionate racing fans so they are hired!

Bul Bulifant:  Well gents the racing has been fast and furious the past few weeks and we are still no closer to figuring out who will prevail in the F1 or Indycar title fights. Haybale we will start with you.  What’s on your mind today?

Morgan In His Prime
Morgan In His Prime

Haybale Murphy:  Bul I still can’t shake the vision of a 72 year old Morgan Shepherd taking out Joey Logano in the Sprint Cup race at New Hampshire a few weeks back.  I thought Morgan Shepherd hung up his helmet with Cale Yarborough and Harry Gant!  It sucks for “Sliced Bread” but it gives me hope to be out there when I’m 70 something.

Bul Bulifant:  How is your racing coming along these days Haybale?

Haybale Murphy:  3 cracked ribs this past weekend after I launched over the rear wheel of some clown who checked up early into the first corner of the main.

Bul Bulifant:  Cool!  Over to you Tab.  What did you think of the German GP?

Tab St Claire:  Two Words — Daniel Ricciardo!  This guy is rapidly becoming my favorite driver in the field.  I’m starting to sing the Elton John song “Daniel” when I’m on a long ride and thinking about racing.  His fight with Alonso was exceptional and his moves into the turn 7 -10 complex were like a page out of the famous Gilles Villeneuve/Rene Arnoux battle at Dijon.  I also love how he just gets out of the car and has a laugh about the whole affair.

Bul Bulifant:  Agreed. The kid has no pressure on him and is basically playing with house money.  Nobody saw this coming.  I may try to write some revised lyrics for

Oh Daniel!
Oh Daniel!

our F1 “Daniel”.

Haybale Murphy:  Damn the both of you are a couple of queers!

Tab St Claire:  I was wondering how long it would take for Haybale to use the gay card.

Haybale Murphy:  What am I supposed to do?  Elton John and F1?  Queers!

Tab St Claire:  Mark Knopfler wrote a song about Nigel Mansell

Haybale Murphy:  Must be a British thing.  I don’t recall Bob Seeger singing about AJ Foyt.

Bul Bulifant:  Haybale if this was a debate competition I would award you two points.  To your point Tab, I’m starting to think that the turn 7-10 complex is my favorite piece of racing real estate on the F1 calendar!  A fast kink, no DRS, heavy braking into a corner where you can use a couple of different lines and then a fast S bend where you can run two wide.  Beautiful!  My early driver of the race, Russian sensation Daniil Kvyat, tossed away his chances in turn 8 for big points by trying to go around the outside of Perez, but hey, that’s what the Torro Rosso is for.  Get it out of the system now before he takes over Vettel’s seat next year!

Tab St Claire:  Ouch

Haybale Murphy:  Confession:  I’m rooting for Ricciardo because he went with the Dale Earnhart 3 for his number.

Bul Bulifant:  Haybale did you just come out of the closet?   A quick moment of silence with 3 fingers raised.  Okay silly season starts now!  Tab what happens next year?

Tab St Claire:  Ferrari dumps Kimi and hires Bottas.  McLaren pries Alonso to lead the Honda project and Button goes back to Williams.  Ferrari, in a panic, then buyout Lewis Hamilton, leading Vettel to jump on the Silver Arrows ride.  Red Bull roll the dice and promote Kvyat to partner Ricciardo, leaving Hulkenberg on the sideline another season waiting for his big break.

Bul Bulifant:  Wow!  I like your thinking!  Shifting to Indycar: Last weekend in Toronto we witnessed a 2004 Sebastian Bourdais rout in the morning race and then Mike Conway won the afternoon lottery in the mixed conditions.  Indycar is so bizarre!  In Conway’s ten starts this year he has two wins and a next best finish of 11th?!  Haybale who wins this Indycar title?

Haybale Murphy: First off, those guys in Toronto always remind me of a C-Main at the Silver Dollar Speedway in Chico.   I would like to say Power but I think that Aussie has a screw loose.  Probably too many concussions.  Trust me I can relate.  Montoya is my guy but I’m going to  have to go with that goofy Helio.  At least they finish with Mid – O, Milwaukee, Sears and Fontana.  That’s cool.  By the way, if you want to join us, two of my brothers and a few cousins will have our RV on the S’s at Sears all weekend and we are towing our Big Pig Trailer Rig.  All you can eat brisket and unlimited bottles of Bud!

Tab St Claire:  I’ll try to stop by on Sunday Haybale.  I’m taking my girlfriend Guinevere wine tasting in St Helena on Saturday and we have tickets with the Infinity Q50 club in an air conditioned tent near turn 3 for the race.

Bul Bulifant:  Oh boy!  Moving along, the F1 match score is now 5-5 for Rosberg and Hamilton.  Who wins in Hungary and who finishes third?

Haybale Murphy:  Hamilton wins, Vettel finishes 3rd.

Tab St Claire:  Hamilton wins, Ricciardo P3.

Bul Bulifant:  Can the Williams win Monza?  That car is a rocket ship in a straight line and seems to have excellent traction out of the slow stuff.

Tab St Claire:  That may be the only race left where the Merc’s have to fear the competition.

Bul Bulifant:  Well gents.  Anything else that you would like to talk about?

Haybale Murphy:  If Marc Marquez wins the next Moto GP at Indy he will tie Giacomo Agostini for 10 wins in a row!  That’s badass.  I’ll be there by the way.  Camping next to the circuit with some of our Midwest aluminum suppliers.  These aluminum guys like to get a little rowdy if you know what I mean.

Bul Bulifant:  Love it Haybale!  Tab?  Final word.

Bentley-Continental-GT3Tab St Claire:  I’m into this Bentley GT3 World Challenge program.

Haybale Murphy:  Gee really?

Tab St Claire:  I can’t wait to see the car at Sears.  What a gorgeous machine!  I’ve got this cool white and green linen team shirt that I purchased and can’t wait to unveil.

Bul Bulifant:  Can it Haybale!

Tab St Claire:  You know the more I see the World Challenge series, the more I think that the Tudor Series should drop prototypes all together and just become an exotic factory GT series.

Bul Bulifant:  Like your style Tab.  Well your choice of cars anyway.

Haybale Murphy:  Zing

Bul Bulifant:  My final thought is of the recent sale of Caterham F1 by Malaysian businessman Tony Fernandes to a consortium of Swiss and Middle Eastern investors.

Moreno at Work in the Eurobrun
Moreno at Work in the Eurobrun

Under Fernandes, the team competed in 86 GP’s and never scored a single point.  Not a single finish by either driver in the top 10!  Hard to believe.  It’s not like the team was a farce such as the Eurobrun’s or Andrea Moda’s of yesteryear.  This was a professional looking outfit with competent people such as Mike Gascoyne designing the cars.  F1 is just that competitive these days.  Let this be a warning to Gene Haas.  How do you make millions in auto racing?  Spend billions!

Haybale Murphy:  What we aren’t going to talk about the Brickyard 400 this weekend?  Look out for my main man Kyle Larson!

Bul Bulifant:  My call is Bad Brad K.  Tab?

Tab St Claire:  This pick is for Haybale.

Haybale Murphy:  Oh Lord I’m bracing myself

Tab St Claire:  I’m going with whoever drives the ExtenZe car.

Bul Bulifant:  Well there you have it folks.  The experts have spoken.  Until next time.

 

Wheel to Wheel Combat
Wheel to Wheel Combat
Categories
2014 Racing Season

Racing into July

While the World Cup has a two day break in the action and the Tour de France is about to get underway,  I’m feeling the need talk about the men who do the sensible thing and use a motor to do their business.  Men who simply push a pedal and steer their way to glory and riches.*merzario

*Side note: If you are ever in a bar and somebody says a race driver doesn’t have to be fit, go online and have them sign up for a 125cc shifter kart class immediately.

“Even the fittest of the Crossfit, TRX, Yoga/Pilates, spinning gym junkies will be suffering after a mere 10 minutes in a kart”, said Kenny Habul.

Here is a quick round the horn look at motorsports as we head into a big July of racing.

F1:

After racing in front of 100,000 plus rabid F1 fans in the Austrian countryside two weeks ago, F1 gets to test their new product out on the loyal British buzzards for the first time at Silverstone.  Will it be Lewis-Nico or Nico-Lewis?  The match score is now 4-3 in favor of Lewis.  I’ve often heard people compare watching F1 to watching soccer because you have to be patient, let the strategy unfold and be ready for a quick strike.  This season certainly feels that way as Lewis and Nico have been routinely staging a full 90 minute battle on the track that often doesn’t play out until the last lap.

Here is a look at the Merc 1-2’s so far this season:

Malaysia:  Lewis P1- Nico P2  +17.3 seconds

Bahrain:  Lewis P1 – Nico P2  +1.0 second

China:  Lewis P1 – Nico P2  +18 seconds

Spain:  Lewis P1 – Nico P2  +0.6 seconds

Monaco:  Nico P1 – Lewis P2  +9.2 seconds

Austria: Nico P1- Lewis P2  +1.9 seconds

Avg 1-2 time differential:  8 seconds.  As a comparison, the 1988 battle between Senna and Prost had an average time differential of 18.013 seconds in their ten 1-2 finishes.

See you Monza!
See you Monza!

What the heck is Bernie doing now?  I read today where Bernie is going to drop Monza after next season.  For What??  Baku, Azerbaijan???  I have a new theory that Bernie only awards races to countries where he can still get laid.  Forget about getting paid, he’s got enough dough already.  I’d imagine he and Flavio will be able to “purchase” some choice dates that weekend.  If he strips Italy off the schedule in the name gaining a foothold in the coveted Caspian Sea market, then I say it’s time to oust the old codger.

 

Indycar:

If anybody wants to win the Indycar title this year the month of July will likely sort out the players as they race 4 times over the next 3 weekends (2 ovals and 2 streets).  Will Power should have a solid lead with 2 wins and 6 top 5’s, but he possesses a choke gene that keeps everybody in the game.  Similar to last year, an Indycar race is next to impossible to predict and the form of each driver seems to swing wildly from week to week.  I can’t recall ever watching a series where every single car in the field can win a race if they get the breaks.  It’s really a testament to how competitive the series is at the moment.

Indycar needs Black Jack's belt to award the victor
Indycar needs Black Jack’s belt to award the victor

The double header in Houston this past weekend reminded me of the WWF Battle Royal that I had the good fortune of attending at the Oakland Coliseum Arena back in ‘85 where Black Jack Mulligan emerged as the victor.  All 23 guys were scraping for every inch of track out there and miraculously rookie Carlos Huertas drew the lucky card and won in the wet conditions.  Amazing stuff.  Of course after winning on Saturday, Huertas finished last on Sunday……And somebody please, for the sake of TV ratings, enroll Huertas in a PR class on acting excited and fired up after winning a major race.  His straight faced, monotone victory interview must have made Nascar people race for their remotes to get a dose of a Waltrip.  Maybe he was in complete shock?…….You know the Indy street tracks are still semi bush league after hearing that two fans managed to cross a hot track during a practice session……Cool to see AJ go nuts on the competitors after the customary Sato crash-out……Is the absence of Dario’s feedback the reason the Ganassi guys are mid-pack at best?………I always hated PT on the track, but I love the PT/Matchett TV team…..I am still Indy!!!

 

MotoGP:

The brilliance of Marquez continues as he has now won 8/8 races this year.  It helps that he really only has to beat his teammate and the two Yamaha’s, but I’m not taking anything away from the guy.  Phenomenal style.  Classy Rider.

I’m excited for 2 years or so down the road when MotoGP is dominated by the Marquez and the Espargaro brothers.  Two sets of brothers going at it will make for fun TV.  Bummer they won’t be putting on a show at Laguna Seca for the foreseeable future.

I know it’s old news, but I’m still boggled over Lorenzo jumping the start in Austin because he had mosquitoes in his eyes!  Ah the old mosquito in the eyes excuse eh Jorge?  Only in Texas!

 

Formula E:

Look at this buzzardly lineup.  This will be 12 more hours that I will have to budget into my already insane sports viewing log.

 

Drivers confirmed so far:

Audi Sport Abt

Lucas di Grassi/Daniel Abt

Virgin Racing

Jaime Alguersuari/Sam Bird

Mahindra Racing

Bruno Senna/Karun Chandhok

Andretti Autosport

Franck Montagny

TrulliGP

Jarno Trulli/Michela Cerruti

Venturi Grand Prix

Nick Heidfeld/Stephane Sarrazin

Aguri

Katherine Legge/Antonio Felix da Costa

e.dams

Sebastien Buemi/Nicolas Prost

Dragon Racing

Mike Conway

 

Rallycross:

I’m officially on the Rallycross bandwagon!  Wild ass, short attention span racing at it’s finest.  And I’m just talking about the stateside Red Bull series with the likes of Nelson Piquet Jr, Scott Speed, Ken Block, Tanner Foust and a bunch of Scandinavian rally drivers I’ve never even heard of.  Can’t wait to see the FIA version.

 

F3:

I’m pumped to see Max Verstappen, son of The Dutch Devil, taking command of the Euro F3 season with six straight wins.  The Verstappen’s still have some unfinished business in F1.

 

Nascar:

Call it a NorCal bias, but I’m on the Kyle Larson bandwagon.  I think the kid has the goods and I hope he can get out of that Ganassi contract and into some real equipment ASAP!

 

Buzzardry and Business:

I’m always intrigued to see the TV ratings numbers and I was able to gather the following info today on the excellent racer.com website:

NBCSN reports that it has averaged 390,000 viewers for IndyCar coverage thus far in 2014, up 34% from the comparable point last year (291K). The network has had similar success with its F1 coverage: Over the first six races on NBCSN, F1 has averaged 377,000 viewers – up 111% from the first six races of the 2013 F1 season (179,000 viewers).  The NASCAR Sprint Cup race at Kentucky, meanwhile, continued a recent downward trend in ratings for NASCAR’s top series. TNT’s telecast of the Saturday night race earned a 2.3 rating and 3.6 million viewers, down 12% in ratings and 10% in viewership from last year (2.6, 4.0m).

 

GoPro Goes Public!  Everybody knows that GoPro is deeply entrenched in motorsports so I’ve been an interested onlooker as their shares have had a wild ride after 5Woodman Wall Street trading days on Wall Street.  They came out of the gate like 2013 Sebastian Vettel and posted a staggering 103% increase, but gave back 13.85% today to close at 42.04.  The Wall Street sharks are smelling blood now so it could get ugly in a hurry.  I wonder how many shares Bernie owns?

Have a great 4th of July!!

 

 

 

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